better now than never

i started a blog, this blog, yesterday.
i also wrote this really long post titled: " a few short introductions" and i thought it was witty and great. then i read it again and the magic was lost.
then i realized... who did i think was going to read this? my friends? which friends?
that didn't sound right. im not alone in the world or anything.
so lets be more specific: which group of friends?
conservative, non conservative or quill?
close, not so close and people i don't even want to talk to but can't tell them?
the ones i call for gimiks or the ones i talk to about games and writing or other such topics that cannot be talked about in such a public manner?
of course i also didn't want them to come visit ( if they ever would bother ) and realize they shouldn't have bothered.
i just want to write.
i want people to read what i wrote so i don't bother neal or other people with all my words of "wisdom" (this is relative) everyday.
so i went to my friendster account, into the land of useless surveys and friends.
(actually i wrote another long introduction in my notebook last night, this time heartwarming and reminiscent of my past but i don't have the time to read my handwriting and type it. plus, i have to work...)
i got one particularly nice survey and answered it.
prepare yourselves, this is a long one.

NAME: pia
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE NORMAL: nope
DO PEOPLE FIND YOU STRANGE: yup
DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD: yup
DO YOU SIN A LOT: yup tho i try hard not to... sometimes
DO YOU BACKSTAB: nope. don't want to stoop that low.
ARE YOU A GOOD FRIEND:yup yup yup. though i'm not good at keeping in touch with them.
ARE YOU IN LOVE:yup. hmmm.(kidding!) yup.
ARE YOU YOUNG:i will never be old. i plan to be immortal someday. how i am going to do that is a secret ;)
EVER BEEN A LEADER OF SOMETHING:yup ( formal events, informal events and crazy events)
EVER KILLED A LIVING CREATURE:ants, cockroaches, flies, some insects bigger than cockroaches, worms, no reptiles yet, no mammals either though i was an accomplice in the death of some mice and a huge rat.
LAST ODD THING DONE:having an argument with someone who doesn't understand what i'm saying.
DO YOU WEAR MAKE-UP:nope. i'm allergic and i don't know how to put it.
DO YOU REBEL:yup, in small ways and occassionally in big ways as well.
EVER STARTED A FIRE:small fires to burn small things and big fires to burn big things :)
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE EVIL:i want to believe i'm inherently good but i know i'm capable of being evil.
DO YOU LIKE CHEATERS:nope. i cheated too you know but only on assignments and lab reports(pisay people understand), never on anything big like exams. funny story, my very first encounter with a cheater was when i was 8. We were taking a quiz and i noticed someone was copying my answers. so i made sure all my answers were wrong and finished early. when i saw him pass his papers (after copying my answers)i corrected all the wrong answers and passed my paper. too bad for him i got perfect on that exam. yes it was nasty but my parents haven't taught me what to do with cheaters yet so i had to improvise.ok.. i may not be so inherently good after all...
DO YOU REGRET:nope. immortals don't regret. good and bad experiences come anytime. good and bad decisions are made. if you regret, you will always have a bad past. instead of just a past.
DO YOU HAVE A BESTFRIEND:yup yup. different levels too. ok i don't have just one best friend, i have lots :)
DO PEOPLE HATE YOU:yeah they probably do. they probably have reason to hate me.
DO YOU HATE PEOPLE:i rarely hate people. unless they really get on my nerves and when they do even the way they breathe gets on my nerves.
CAN YOU KILL SOMEBODY:just because i hate them probably not. to save myself and people i love or just care about ( two different things ) i would kill without hesitation.
DO YOU CUT YOURSELF?:nope. i've never drawn my own blood intentionally. blades and knives suddenly become dull when they touch my skin.
EVER TASTED BLOOD:yup. mine mostly. other people's blood occassionally...
DO YOU CARE WHAT OTHERS MAY THINK OF YOU?:when i was really young, i did. then i learned that it was too much power for other people to have over me so i stopped giving them that power.
ARE YOU GOTHIC:yes. though my appearance never convinces people. i always look "nice" even when i'm mad.
DO YOU SMOKE:nope. yuck. though it depends on what needs to be smoked.
CONSUME DRUGS:good question.... what do you mean by consume? ;)
WHAT DO YOU WEAR:when i feel like i need to be "pretty" (this is all relative) i dress up in cute blouses and jeans. otherwise i wear shirts and shorts and rubber shoes!this applies to work days as well.
DO YOU LIKE THE SUN:i don't have anything against it but i can't walk under it with my eye wide open ( my eyes are just slits) even if it's not a sunny day. it's one of the reasons my sister believes i'm a vampire.
HAVE YOU LOST SOMEONE YOU LOVE:lots of dogs, because they had to be given away but there was one who died in my arms, wolfie, because someone fed him fish. i stayed with him the night he died.
HOW DOES GRIEF FEEL:like i want to write about it.
YOUR ROLE MODEL:neil gaiman. he who writes whole novels in notebooks even if he has a laptop computer and realizes that snow white is really a vampire deserves a special place in my life.if i can be just as prolific as he is,(rich and famous as he is right now is good too) i'll be happy.
YOUR HEART DESIRES TO BE WITH WHOM:everyone i'm with right now.
YOUR LISTENING TO:loud aircon noises, keyboard tappings and lots of anime songs, matchbox 20 and eraserheads (for the good old days).
DO U HATE YOURSELF:only when i do really stupid things i can't undo.
EVER GET DRUNK? :once, in the middle of the casino floor of the Sahara in Las Vegas. With my aunt panicking because she couldnt leave her huge bucket of quarters to call someone since we were in las vegas and i wasn't in the right condition to protect it.i was so drunk i hit my head on the slots :) i sobered up like 15 min after that. those were really great drinks, zombie and long island ice tea. here in the philippines those drinks taste like juice. i wonder where we get the recipe?